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I just heard about this Wizard of Oz horror movie, Gale: Yellow Brick Road , and I am actually super stoked to go see it. As someone who has always loved The Wizard of Oz , the idea of it being twisted into something dark and unsettling feels weirdly perfect. The description says Dorothy, now an elderly woman haunted by her past, tries to warn her granddaughter Emily before dark forces pull her into Oz, a once familiar land now twisted by horrors. Following the yellow brick r

I made this collage years ago to inspire me every single day. At the time, I thought it was so cool, like a little visual reminder of who I wanted to be and what I was reaching for. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople#StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma #TheaterAndTherapy

I was cleaning out my mom’s garage and came across this old Oprah collage I made years ago. For a long time, she was my guru for everything. I used to watch the Oprah DVD collection constantly, like it held all the answers I didn’t know how to ask yet. Weirdly, just a few weeks ago I found out she still has a show, and the episode I caught was about not talking to your parents. Of course it was. She always seems to show up right when I need her. I think I’m going to donate th

It’s funny how “Relax” keeps popping up on the radio lately, like it’s suddenly having a moment again even though it’s definitely not new. What’s wild is that I never really stopped to think about what the song was actually singing about. For years it was just a catchy background track until one day it clicks and you’re like ohhh. Now every time I hear it, I immediately think of Zoolander and that iconic walk off scene. Somehow the song makes more sense there dramatic, ridicu

I’ve become a little obsessed with Betty Bethards’ The Dream Book , and it’s officially my new morning go-to. I wake up, flip through it, and try to make sense of whatever strange message my brain sent me overnight. I don’t even need it to be exact, I just like believing my dreams mean something instead of feeling like random chaos. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople#StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThro

My therapist came back last week after a two month break because he was having a baby. We did our first session, and it was strange because the last time I had spoken to him was when everything ended. The SeaWorld job. Hansel and Gretel. Basically when my life stopped again. So it’s been two months without therapy, and when things got bad there was no place to put it. Especially during the holidays. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s. Yes, I had a good week with Six merchand

In the last few weeks, my dreams have turned into a very dark anthology series starring me, and I do not remember auditioning. I’ve died in more ways than seems reasonable for one subconscious. Sudden endings, slow ones, dramatic ones, quiet ones. Different locations, different vibes, same result. It’s like my brain keeps saying, “What about this  ending?” and I keep waking up like, no thank you, next. None of it feels random, though. It feels pointed, repetitive, like my min

Lately I keep falling asleep in short, unfinished chapters. Five minutes here, ten minutes there, like my body is hitting the snooze button on life while my brain refuses to power down completely. It’s not real sleep, just these brief disappearances where I wake up more tired than before, confused about what day it is and slightly betrayed by my own nervous system. I think it’s what happens when you’ve been running on adrenaline for too long. My body is begging for rest while

I watched Stone Cold Fox  this morning and really liked it. The opening monologue especially caught my attention, so much so that I want to go back and write it out. It felt sharp and honest, like it could easily be the start of my own movie. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople#StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma #TheaterAndTher

Even though I took the Christmas stuff down right after Christmas, it’s been sitting in the garage for weeks. I had some master plan for how to put it all away, but I just couldn’t make it happen. For days it was just me moving it around, pretending I was doing something. Anyway, somehow I finally got it all put somewhere. I have no idea how it actually happened, but at least it’s done. Feels like a small victory in the chaos of life. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMy

It’s 3 a.m. again. I woke up from another death dream, and at this point I’ve died so many ways in the last few weeks that anyone who says dreams don’t mean anything is lying. The worst part isn’t even the dream itself, it’s what comes after. I can’t fall back asleep for at least an hour, so I get up, drink some water, eat something small, watch a little TV, and wait for my nervous system to stand down. It’s exhausting and frustrating, like my brain refuses to let the night e

The mind doesn’t produce a nightmare without a reason. Nightmares aren’t random, they’re what happens when something goes unheard during the day and demands space at night. Fear, grief, and truth don’t disappear just because we ignore them, they wait until we’re asleep and defenseless. A nightmare isn’t the mind turning against us, it’s the mind trying to process what we’ve been carrying for too long. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals...

Important question. What is the correct way to put on a new roll of toilet paper? Over or under? I lean over. It’s efficient and feels right. Under feels chaotic. But honestly, if it’s on the holder and not empty when you need it, that might be the real win. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople#StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma

On November 6 I mailed a package to my friend Shannon with some costume pieces she had generously let me borrow. I sent it to her studio, thinking nothing of it, and a few days later I texted to ask if it had arrived. She told me they don’t receive deliveries there, which was news to me. I checked the tracking and it said “attempted delivery, will try again tomorrow,” and then… nothing. No updates. No movement. After thirty minutes on the phone with USPS I got the same answer

After watching Southern Charm  and listening to Craig talk about using ChatGPT as  his therapist, I decided to try something similar and asked ChatGPT to help me come up with questions for my own therapy session, because apparently even my self-reflection now needs assistance. Surprisingly, it didn’t feel lazy, it felt necessary. The questions weren’t dramatic or groundbreaking, just quietly honest. Why can’t my brain relax when my body is exhausted. What am I trying to prote

1,000 posts—it’s a miracle! If I ever wondered (or if anyone else did) what I’ve been through, well, there’s a whole archive of proof....

Well… I just  watched my episode of The Price Is Right —and right before I got to spin the wheel, it cut to a bulletin about Trump’s new...

The truth is a light, no matter how much darkness it takes to get there. #theater #musicals #toxicfamily #toxicpeople #narcissism...

Here’s something I learned in group therapy last week: When someone has experienced trauma, chaos, or ongoing stress, their nervous...

I just finished watching all 8 episodes of Dying for Sex  on FX (you can watch it on Hulu), and I absolutely loved it. Fun fact—Nikki...