The Feed

My boss at La Jolla reached out yesterday about an Assistant House Manager position I actually applied for back in October of last year. As much as I would’ve loved to say yes, I’ll be gone doing Oliver!. It’s a little bittersweet, honestly, but maybe it’s one of those moments that feels like a sign. As much as I’ve tried to find my footing here in San Diego between La Jolla, SDMT, and SeaWorld, it just hasn’t quite felt like my place. So while it’s hard to pass something up,

How do you keep fighting a battle you already know you’re never going to win? When someone’s memory of you is so filtered and jaded that no matter what you say or do, it just doesn’t land. You can know your truth, try to explain it, and still feel like you’re arguing with a version of yourself that isn’t even real. At the same time, it’s beyond frustrating hearing that constant, low-level commentary about everything you do. Not dramatic, just steady enough to slowly wear you

So the last couple days my mom has been on a full mission trying to find a new refrigerator because the old one decided that ice cream should now be served as soup. After a deep dive of research, she picked one but decided we needed to cut part of a cabinet to make room for a taller fridge. She ordered it and then immediately started panicking that it wouldn’t fit through the door, but I assured her it would if they just took the doors off. Flash forward to this morning, the

I cannot believe it’s May tomorrow. How did that even happen? My birthday is right around the corner and it honestly feels a little crazy, like wasn’t it just January five minutes ago? Time is moving way too fast and apparently I’m getting really old now. Someone tell it to slow down just a little. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depressio

I can’t believe how much has already happened with Oliver! in just the past few days. Everything is starting to come together so quickly and it’s honestly a little wild in the best way. I’m really excited about this show and everything we’re building, and I can’t wait to get started and see it all come to life. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBo

A lot of contracts and orders were finalized yesterday, and honestly it kind of scares me a little, but I guess it’s what needs to happen to move forward. Big steps always feel a little intense right before they start to feel exciting. On a brighter note, I’m really excited to announce that I will be the set designer and technical director for Opera SLO’s The Mikado this October. I’m looking forward to diving into it and creating something really special. #LiveYourDream #Cre

So the weirdest thing happened. I took out all the plants and aquarium decorations to clean everything because the tank hadn’t been fully cleaned in a long time. After I put everything back in and the water finally settled, almost 24 hours later, I noticed that the swordtail in there had somehow “shrunk.” I told my mom and she immediately said that’s impossible, fish don’t shrink. So we looked it up and learned that swordtails actually have live babies, and most of them usual

When you take a long drive, like San Diego to LA, sometimes it’s nice to turn the music off and just think. Some of my best reflecting happens on the road. Thank God for talk texting too, that’s how I get most of my stuff done while ideas are flowing. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma #Thea

A few days ago my mom sent me a screenshot with the caption, “From your dad to me for you.” It was about displaying art at the county fair, such a simple thing, but it landed in a complicated place. Since we haven’t spoken in over four years, my first thought was oddly basic, like well, I’m obviously not dead to him, something made him think of me, something made him send it along. And then the second thought came right after… why not just send it to me directly. Maybe I alre

Yesterday my mom sent me a meme about writing things down. I’m not totally sure why, and I plan to ask her today… but it made me laugh because I thought, “Does she realize I do this every single day right here?” This little space has quietly become my daily practice. Some days it’s journaling, some days storytelling, some days processing life in real time. Maybe I should actually start promoting this blog instead of treating it like a hidden notebook. I can see a small handfu

Finally back in my own bed after what felt like weeks away. I think my mom had a really good visit with her people, though she was exhausted from packing so much into a few days. I do have a little regret about not making it to Arizona to see Melissa, but so much got accomplished these past few days that I’m feeling good about where things stand. I also got to spend some time with my sister, which meant a lot, and I did what I kept telling myself I wanted to do—spend time wit

Things are in motion and it feels good to finally see everything starting to move. There’s still a lot to do, but the pieces are coming together in a way that feels real and exciting. I’m really looking forward to this summer and everything it’s shaping up to be. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingThe

Today I will be on this computer a lot sending out emails doing research and trying to get organized. It is one of those focused get things in order kind of days. Wish me luck. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma #TheaterAndTherapy

My sister asked me to make dinner for her family last night so they’d have something new, so we went with Salisbury steak, mashed potatoes, and Brussels sprouts. It actually turned out great… even though the cooking process felt a little like I was in the basement kitchen of Next Level Chef —no lids, no clear system, and a lot of “where is anything?” energy. But somehow it all came together. Of course, the kids opted for quesadillas. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyS

3 nights in a row of good sleep—what!? That almost never happens, so I’m going to take that as a win. I’ve been watching Vanderpump Villa and it’s honestly pretty bad and super over-produced, like totally dumb in the best background-noise way. This morning I’m going thrift shopping with my sister, and who knows what the rest of the day will look like since there’s never really a plan made ahead of time. My sister and I probably look like we don’t want to hang out with everyo

Another great sleep last night, and I woke up to some exciting news with things quickly starting to move forward on something really exciting. How it will all happen, I have no idea, but I believe it will. I spent part of the day eating Burger King and working on a few things, then my sister surprised me with a shake, which was very needed. I should have DoorDashed today but didn’t, instead I just hung out, which ended up being really fun with my sister, Archie, and Gabe too.

After sleeping so well last night at my sister’s, which honestly never happens. I’m going to the zoo with my mom and her people, so we’ll see how it goes and hopefully it’s a good, easy day where everything runs smoothly. #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma #TheaterAndTherapy

Last night I used my “free” night at Viejas Casino, which honestly turned out to be a mistake because I ended up losing all my money. I had my sister’s DUI at 10:30, which was just a phone call and actually went really well, and then a Zoom meeting for The Mikado set that also went well. Now I’m just going to chill for the day and go see The Notebook at the Civic! #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMat

Today is one of those slightly chaotic, very real-life kind of days. My mom’s cousin, her daughter, and the daughter’s daughter are arriving for a week-long visit, and they are coming in on two separate flights, so there is a steady stream of arrivals, timing, and coordination happening all at once. My mom is completely MIA right now, so I am holding down the fort while there is a gardener outside and a cleaning woman inside the house. My mom is definitely stressed about it,

I think I solved it! #LiveYourDream #CreativeHealing #ThisIsMyStory #Theater #Musicals #ToxicPeople #StrippedAMemior #MentalHealthMatters #FromStageToPage #HealingThroughArt #VulnerablyBold #Depression #Manipulation #Bipolar #BreakingTheStigma #TheaterAndTherapy