Lips

Today’s big accomplishment: crawling out of bed just long enough to make this post… and then immediately questioning whether that counted as productivity.

Yesterday was actually great. I dragged  Lupe and Moe dragged to Lips, and we had such a blast. Moe and I have only hung out once outside of SeaWorld, so it felt really nice to have a fun night with people who actually like being around me. We were trashed, laughing, living like actual humans with social lives. It felt like a piece of the old me sneaking back out.

But then I sobered up. I came home. I went to bed. And this morning… I woke up sad. Sad about my life again. Sad that the fun parts feel so temporary. Sad that I don’t do the wild, exciting things I used to do.

And the worst part? It’s not because I don’t want to. It’s because I don’t really have friends here. Not like I used to.

It’s been a long time since I felt like I had my people, my chaos, my scene. I miss my old life. The mess, the energy, the constant something happening. Even if it was too much at times, at least it made me feel alive.

Now, most days it’s just me and my thoughts… and sometimes those thoughts forget to be kind.

So yeah, today I stayed in bed. Because sometimes that’s all you can do when you’re trying to figure out how to feel like yourself again.

Here’s hoping tomorrow gives me a little more sparkle. ✨